I'm just different.
Friday, August 20, 2004
im super irritated with myself. probably not my fault that im feeling this way, i guess external factors do affect me too.
went for training and didnt think i performed, as usual. IVP starts in 2 weeks' time and here i am, taking my own sweet time to fit into the team. unfit, cant do proper feeding, cant run at the correct timing, i seriously dunnoe wat im doing. i attribute everything to my mental block. i dunnoe what im doin to myself.
cant even get into my blog a few hours ago. dunnoe what the hell is going on. and the stupid chinese star hangs my entire com. simply retardness. and i have to use my retarded chinese star cos my IT savvy tutor puts up this platform for us to engage in online forum and i dun even know wat to comment. i hate it when i hv to do thgs for the sake of doing it.
i feel like im losing my privacy. there are things i cant do, cant say just becos others are invading into my space. in actual fact, i think these people are plain dishonest. they just like to find out more when i dun want to tell them things, so they resort to other sources. isnt it weird that just becos of these people, i have to adjust myself? i should just tell them off, why should i just stand by and do nothg?
poor yanyan suffered cos i said smthg very mean to her. sorry dear, i really didnt mean it..
i wish huilin is here with me. she will listen to all my frustrations. she is prob the only one who understands how i really feel.
Sunshine ; Friday, August 20, 2004