Monday, November 26, 2007
though one silly event threw me off my equilibrium but im still blessed with many great things!!!i went for ict conference on thursday and it was an eye opener. i saw how pple really make use of technology to enhance their teaching and how some just follow the trend blindly and use technology just for the sake of using it.then friday i went on course with twinnie who has been going through this rough patch with me. the reading seminar was a gain. books can really do wonders and open up our minds and our world. must read more to gain more, books!! books !!! here i come!!!poor twinnie was ill for a few days and i think what has happened didnt really help her as well. sorry twinnie, i have implicated you in a way or another. although it doesnt help a lot but sometimes i really think that pple will not see you and i together if im not around. anyhow, thks for believing in me and being with me. love you lots.you know, everyone in school has someone to support them except me. twinnie has her ro, and when she moves up, jo and hz will be there. hz has jo there too. kei has a responsible ro since she came. who do i have? and when things happen, my ro will be more eager to spread the gossips instead of helping me. now even pple downstairs think i am someone who doesnt support a colleague. and now im just staying cos my friends are here.. sad..fell aslp during sat and sunday's service..opps...the whole week has taken a toll on me but it ended well, went to wala with 2 bday girls and the guys. it was just funny talking nonsense and banging glasses and listening to good music!! ah!! not forgetting cleaning the house with the help of my beloved ah neh!! heehehe...always so willing to help and support. thank you ah neh!! love you too!!its going to be a more enjoyable week, starting on the list is BBQ!! hahaha...food, food and more food!!! please dont rain in the evening, please help twinnie to get well soon!!! neh, kei, twin, yoyo, love you all...
Sunshine ; Monday, November 26, 2007
it has been an eventful week. after being disturbed for 2 days,thinking that pple are heartless enough to "bully" my friend, i ended up knowing that she doesnt regard me as a friend at all. i am actually one of those who drove her away cos i like to "talk", give negative comments, say thgs that are not nice...why??why?? i kept asking myself, why did you choose to confide in us and then now say that we are the ones who betrayed you? what did we say? why pretend to be our friend and accept our favours and encouragement and then now tell pple that we are pple whom you dislike? since when have we gave dispproving comments? since when did we talk abt you? do you remember the times when we tried our best to lift you up? do you remember the times when we bought you lunches when you were so busy and insisted that you come for our gatherings? do you remember the gifts and cards we gave you? do you remember the words we said to you?sigh...you left but you left, hurting us in a manner that we would never thought it was you who brought the greatest betrayal to us. leave then..carry all your pretence and leave us..lest we get all these hurtful words from you later.i hope you will really be happy where you are..cos twinnie and i are going to do better.
Sunshine ; Monday, November 26, 2007
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
i gt cursed as a big mouth and someone who 借刀杀人, maybe also someone who is despicable cos i was asked what happened. i never heard all these things being arrowed to me at all cos i have never done all these thgs.would i want to step on someone who is not going to be there anymore? is there any value in doing it? why would i gain? entertainment? if i want to do something so despicable, i would have done it the very first day i stepped into this place.why would i want to kill her? she has not given me any bad face at all, she has not been rude to me as she was with others, why would i want to kill her? for wat? just so that she will step down? are there benefits to speak of if she steps down? i should feel very sad cos someone whom i have favour with is actually passing the baton to someone else.so, i deliberately said something. i want to get rid of someone whom i have favour with, i used my "friend" who is leaving soon but posed no threat to me to help me do the job and instead of feeling elated and on top of the world, i actually feel like shit now......does it sound logical to you?luckily i brought someone along to listen to the so-called "management" whom i supposedly said many many things to, otherwise no matter what i said, 都翻不了身。sigh...好一句“借刀杀人”...when all i said was she did not get what she deserved and i was deemed as ruining a person's career and reputation and that was the end of the friendship. yes i will reflect and yes i am in the wrong, just cos i said how i felt and i smeared someone's reputation when i didnt even use anyone as a topic. i was never the one who walked into that office, i oredi explained that i was pulled in and whatever the conversation was about, i have made known to those who needed to know.abt the person whom i talked to on thurs, we were discussing abt a conference that i was supposed to attend and whatever i said, i also made known to everyone oredi. the only thg i said and didnt tell anyone was this, "she has done so much and i have not done anything like hers, she did so much for the kids, i will never be able to do what she did."the 2nd time when i mentioned her name : " she prob wld hv stayed if she had spoken to her." i admit that this is just my personal view.was that enough to backstab u?so now, how did i backstab u? when you were never the topic that i discussed abt? yr friend is right, why would i want to do anythg to someone who is leaving soon?"your explanation is not impt anymore." my heart just sank when i saw this msg. no matter what i did or how i wanted to explain, they are just not impt anymore. wat else matters then?是自己太傻了吧？还是自己错了？因为害怕遗失一段友情而不停地紧张，最后换来一句句“是你活该”、shut your big mouth、借刀杀人、利用别人来达到自己的目的。。。人还是走了。。。我还是失去了我的友情。。。我承认了，是我的错。
Sunshine ; Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
what a hectic day..my table is messier, my hair is crazily styled n i feel just as tired as ever..ahhhh this is crazy!!!
ok need to settle down and only allow pyscho notes to enter my brain cells..until every synapse can spell p-y-s-c-h-o-l-o-g-y
i act had a lot to blog but i think im beginning to live my nick, "look past and look ahead".
thats good, i think its good to throw away unhappy thoughts.
hmmm..looking forward to BBQ and more cooking sessions!! i would love to bake but too bad, no oven at home. if only i know how to bake then i will splurge choc fudge all over the cake!! hahah!!
totally despised those who manipulate relationships to get what they want..make use of friendship to acheive their goal. i feel so sad for those who are blinded by her powder.
i should care more abt my loved ones. i miss huilin..she has showed me the undying love between friends and a true friend is really someone who doesnt care abt who is right or wrong, a true friend will put aside her pride and still talk to you even when there is a misunderstanding, just becos she loves you so much..its about who values the friendship and want to bridge the gap. i love you, lin!!!
i read my bible last night, i felt so calm after that.
praise the Lord, His love endures forever.
Sunshine ; Wednesday, November 07, 2007
end of TMAs...spells the beginning of EXAM!!grades for tmas have been exceedingly well, thank God for his grace.holidays are coming soon...have the end in mind and look ahead!!have to believe strongly that God will deliver the righteous..all i need is faith.
Sunshine ; Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Friday, November 02, 2007
common marking is a useless way of marking..waste of my time..kei's seat has become my refuge..so that i wont see smelly faces..
Sunshine ; Friday, November 02, 2007
