I'm just different.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
i raised my voice at the earliest class i had today, i cant help it, am i having my menses or what? i keep getting pissed off but anyway, nothing could beat the level of unhappiness i had inside me this evening.
how can someone totally disregard the mistakes that she she made just because i said i was going to take disciplinary action? by the way, i explained my sort of disciplinary action to her, i said i will make her come early and i will sit with her and ensure that she does her work untilshe is responsible enough to complete her work. is this non-constructive? is not edifying enough? if after all the chances that i had given her and the pep talks i gave her were not building her up at all, then i really dont know what was i doing all these while and what kind of an idiot i am to think that she will learn her mistakes one day. i was probably just a fool thinking that i will be a good teacher. telling her that it is not her lost work that made me upset, it is not her absent-mindedness that infuriate me but it is her attitude that is a disappointment to me.
i told her she is smart but she is lazy. whatever la...my actions just dont get reciprocated and i am sick and tired of calling someone for the whole day who just tell me that she has made a honest mistake nonchalantly. how many honest mistakes will she allow her to make until it becomes a dishonest one?God, is this what you want me to go through? why?i dont even care if it goes downstairs, in fact i hope that it does, so that she will see how unfair she has been to me.God i know why you put me through this, is it because you want me to know that im not cut out to be a teacher?
Sunshine ; Thursday, July 06, 2006